Thursday, August 7, 2008

Gives a new definition to 'down the drain'...

Here's a tricky one - what do you do if you're in the middle of a degree - or, rather, pretty close to the end of a degree - and you realise that you don't actually want to do what the degree trains you to do?

That...is a terrifying realisation. It totally destroys all motivation, robs of the joy...

I should have realised a long time ago that when I said 'I'm just trying to do something to finance what I really want to do', I was going a rather circular route to do it badly.

It's long been a guiding principle (to me, at least) that the purpose of university study is to prepare you for life in the workplace (sans the 9-5 bit) - for example, law students have 100% exams, and philosophy students have plenty of essays. Doing Education and Theology simultaneously is too much, and I think that that's going to continue, regardless of how much I went into it believing that it was complementary. It may be complementary, but it's too much, and it'll continue to be too much.

Will I complete the degree, though? I think so. But I don't think I'll be a teacher.
That said, I may well be wrong, and this may simply be a coping mechanism caused by trying to do too much - it's happened once before, after all. At this point, however, it seems that this is where I am at.

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